This year when friends and relatives ask what you would like for Chanukah, Solstice, Christmas, Kwanza, tell them you would like something that will help you save mankind.
Firing LessonsEveryone knows that when the world in chaos someone is going to have to wrestle a madman to the ground, take his gun away from him, and hold him at gun point. If this task falls to you, firing lessons will make damn sure you know how to aim and fire a gun. Otherwise, you'll be like villains fighting George Reeves' Superman.
Metal Working Lessons
|Death Angel Mushrooms from Grub Street San Francisco|
Kickboxing LessonsWho doesn't want to build muscles, learn how to throw punches properly, and perfect her roundhouse kick? Earn that Self-Rescuing Princess shirt!
Archery LessonsIf we are being honest and facing facts, we have to admit that guns are complicated pieces of machinery that most of us will not be able to recreate. What's more, even if we have guns galore, ammo is finite. Archery lessons will be invaluable once the bullets are gone. That deer that would feed a family for a month isn't going to lie down on the table.
Gardening and Botany ClassesDiets have to consist of more than meat, but growing vegetables is not easy. Yes, I know, plant the seeds, water the seeds, then they grow sounds simple, but there are variables. If you plant carrots but weeds are choking them out, how do you tell which green leafy things in the garden should be yanked?
There will be a time before your garden grows: botany classes will ensure that you know the difference between the safe mushrooms and the poisonous ones.
First Aid & CPR CoursesIf the world is blowing up, having a handle on how to treat and dress wounds will be invaluable. Knowing how to clean a wound without destroying the new cells that are trying to grow will save lives.
Honestly, I like a good Doomsday theory as much as the next chick in thick rimmed glasses, but I'm with the scientists on this one. After all, our calendar ends every year and nothing horrible happens (not counting glowing balls falling from the sky, Ryan Seacrest, and horrendous hangovers).
Follow me on Twitter: @Anypocalypse
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