Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Girl, You Know Dem Queens is Survivors!

After having watched a few seasons of RuPaul’s Drag Race and of Drag U, I came to an important conclusion. Drag Queens will survive the Apocalypse regardless of its form.

Jujubee in RuPaul's Drag Race
No, seriously. Hear me out.

On Drag Race the girls compete to see who will win the competition a la [insert reality competition show here]. On Drag U they help biological women rediscover their femininity and compete to see who gets her va-jay-jay back most completely. This is not exactly ground-breaking stuff. However, the way they see the world is.

Each contestant has to demonstrate her Creativity, Uniqueness, Nerve, and Talent. How does that translate into a survival skill set?

The Drag Queens who compete have to prove that they see things in a way most people don’t. Given about 20 minutes and some random items they must cobble together almost anything out of what looks like nothing. In a day or so they create an outfit out of what one might find in a sparsely furnished room or in a janitorial closet.

As we know, being able to look at what you have at hand and find new uses for those items is a major boon when trying to survive the apocalypse. Queens recognize that everything can be used and turned into something else. Honestly: someone who can look at a couch cushion and see a new set of hips and a booty can recycle and reuse anything.

Pandora Boxx
Every Queen has her very own personality and isn’t afraid to flaunt it. Every item, every action, every gesture is hers. She even brings her own personal flair to the ones that are Liza Minelli’s, Phyllis Diller's, Cher’s, or Madonna’s.

However, the good Drag Queen also knows when to tow the line: having a strong personality but not always trying to be the dominant person in the room is a unique trait indeed. This sounds contradictory, but a team cannot work if everyone is vying to be the boss.

Drag Queens are male teens and men who are generally gay. Not only did they have to come to terms with their sexuality and a society that doesn’t necessarily want to accept the Beind Closed Doors differences, they have chosen to further push the boundaries of sexual and gender equality very much in the public eye.

How much nerve, how much chutzpah, how big of balls does it take to don a dress and a persona and to perform in the spotlight? (Now think of what they have to do with their real balls to pull this off!)

Part of survival is facing one’s fears and conquering them. You don’t get braver or ballsier than a man dressed as a buxom woman performing for an audience.

Ghetto space tuna will be nothing for the Queens.

This elusive trait includes a multitude of abilities that don't seem to have much to do with eluding mutated rabid city dwelling crocodiles. While dancing, lip syncing, clothing design and creation impersonation, and caricature may not appear to have anything to do with avoiding becoming pets for the children of the Crocs of Doom they could be invaluable.

Raven for NOH8
Dancers are lithe and flexible. Lip syncing requires timing and owning it. Being able to impersonate a sympathizer (and recreate her uniform) will help the girls free themselves and others!

Talent is really the culmination of the first three traits. Without creativity, one will not come up with the escape plan. Without a strong sense of self, the confidence needed to carry out a plan simply does not exist. Without nerve, nothing happens. Without nerve, or confidence, or bravery, or whatever you want to call it, there is no action because bravery is action's fuel. A car without gas won't go. Regardless of what else is there, a plan cannot come to fruition if no one has nerve enough to carry it out.

What other survival skills do the Queens have that we can take and make our own? Tell us in the comments!

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